Sorry Ms. Brown, I am for Real
12:37 p.m. Monday, Dec. 20, 2004
from A: [@] [www]
stacy, i'm sorry i was a bitch to you last year. I hope you and Heather are good roomie's. I miss her as a friend. I'm cleaning up my life. Maybe one day I will have her as a friend again. I'm sorry for the trouble I put you in from putting her in trouble with me.
*******************************
Dear Ashley Brown:
Do you remember writing this? well you should, because you signed it around December 5th. (Give or take, the guestbook site is a bit weird with date/time combinations).
the reason i bring this up is because when you signed my guestbook this profound apology (and spelling my name wrong. Wow) my lovely guestbook site recorded your IP address. And so when you decided (Ever so eloquently) to be a coward and let the world onto the fact that i am such a loose woman of ill repute�it logged your IP again. So regardless of the fact that you think you can "scare" me by saying something that...hmm, everyone knows is a total fabrication, you weren�t smart enough to block your IP address. So. SURPRISE! I know it was you.
And yeah, you weren't ever a bitch to me last year. So I don't even understand what this "apology" is about. And then to turn, so beautifully, in such a short amount of time, is so literary. Congratulations. You've grown as a character. You have taken The Catcher in the Rye to a whole new level of understanding for me. I know now what Holden was searching for�it was change And you illustrate it so wonderfully. Oh wait. no. you don�t. Because you haven�t changed. You are still being the same,. immature, spoiled, terrified, insecure, person that you probably were in 7h grade.
How about this, Ms. Brown? If you are going to insult someone? why not try to be a little more creative? Maybe find out what makes 'em tick? Maybe find their weakness. Maybe really hit them where it hurts. Because...you calling me whore...and a "c*nt f*cker" isn't exactly hurtful to me. It's just stupid.
Now! If you wanted to really hurt me. Maybe you could say "You insecure woman. You relationship-phobic."
"You overanalyzing, heart breaking woman"
"You lazy OCD freak"
"Hot dog eater."
"You are such a loser. You can't even get a boyfriend"
�Book worm!�
�English major. Someone won�t be able to get a job!�
See, because then i can retort easier. Such as:
PHYSCO (get it heather? precious_ashley is a physco...not a psycho...)
I have my bouts of OCD, but I�m also rather slobbish and lazy. It works for me.
I enjoy hot dogs�even if heather does not! ;)
My major, English, is a real major. Unlike an individualized major program. Good job! You went to college and couldn�t decide on anything. So General Studies it is, huh? Oh yeah, I�m not get a job. Not at all. But at least I can say something when I�m asked what my degree was in and not look down at the floor in shame.
And as far as the �relationship� stuff�, i don't want to deal with the burden of a weird romantic entanglement, but i still have friends. I have friends who love me more than anything in the world. I am best friends with amazing people I have friends who are real, and not just online. I have friends who comment on my journal and gladly stick up for me, but i know their faces. I'm best friends with them. They live right down the street from me. Versus internet found wackos. These people you, literally, know nothing about besides what they choose to put on their website. Good job. good fiends right there. Don't worry, you'll find some real ones soon enough.
Ooo oo! or maybe, i could just say how i don�t' have to lie to make people interested in me. I don't have to lie about deaths that never happened. Or miscarriages. Or men who are "interested" in me...but clearly just for sex. Not friendship. Just sex. Good job, ash!
so maybe instead of calling ME these creative slurs, you should take a step back, and realize that you're just calling yourself these things. You flatter yourself by thinking you have "scared" me. You have not scared me, darling. You have saddened me. You have saddened me because you think I care. You have successfully managed to be more juvenile than a 9th grader. So as i said before, next time, if you are going to slander me...maybe you should sign your name. Because chances are, i can figure out who you are.
Thank you for the amazing spark in creativity. Happy Holidays!
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1952-2005
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